Monday, October 25, 2010

2 Weeks

It's amazing how fast time goes and how much can change in just a few weeks.  Ethan today you are 2 weeks old, in some ways it feels like you've been part of our family forever and in others it seems like just yesterday we were welcoming you into the world.  Either way, our lives are completely different in just those short 2 weeks.  We are starting to establish some sort of a routine and as a mom I'm starting to feel like things are a little easier.  I've long let go of the house being clean, although I'm still trying to make sure it's at least picked up, and I spend my days making sure you're taken care of instead.  I'm starting to be able to have an idea for what's for dinner when Dad walks in the door, although making it is still presenting a challenge!  I'm working hard at reinserting some of the normalcy to our lives, dinner on the table, showers taken, the house picked up, and everyone taken care of...it doesn't always happen, but I'm trying. You and I though have definitely got some sort of a rhythm down for the day.  You are an awesome baby and I really can't complain!  You usually go to bed around 11 or 11:30pm, this is a little late for mom's liking, but I'm slowly adjusting.  Once you're asleep (and you usually fight going to sleep a little) you sleep for 4-5 hours!  I'm a lucky lady to get a solid stretch of sleep in.  Then you wake up and either breastfeed or take a bottle of breast milk and are up for about an hour and then go back to bed for 2 hours.  This morning you were pretty fussy from 4:30am to 6:30am when Daddy woke up for work, but you were never really awake.  You were grunting and whimpering, but stayed asleep, so Daddy and I tried to sleep through it as well.  You usually take a couple of good naps during the day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon.  By the time Daddy is home from work, you want to stay awake and hang out with him!  As for sleeping you're still hanging out in your boppy and either sleeping next to Mommy on the couch during the day, or in the bassinet in Mommy and Daddy's room at night.  Soon I think we'll start trying to wean you away from the boppy and eventually into your own crib!  For now though, Mommy and Daddy like having you close at night!

You're eating every 2-3 hours and usually eat 2-3 ounces at a time.  Mommy is still working on breastfeeding with you...you seemed to not be satisfied if you're not eating from a bottle, but we're working on this.  So mommy usually pumps and then feeds you the breast milk from a bottle.  I'm hoping this will change, but for now it's what works and we're going with it.  I'm working on reminding myself that I was planning on going into breastfeeding with an open mind and doing what works.  As long as you're growing and are happy, I'm okay with where we are.

Over the past two weeks we've had several visitors and have made it out of the house a few times too.  We've gone to Target, to the Doctor, to visit Aleks and Kade, Great-Grandma Cleo, Great-Grandma Doris, to get your newborn photos taken, we've even had lunch with Daddy and Auntie Katie at the office where Daddy got to show you off a little!  Oh and we can't forget the ever important trip to Caribou!  Getting ready and out of the house is getting easier.  Today you gave Mommy the gift of getting to shower and do her hair, you just laid in your crib like a big boy looking at all of your stuffed animals!  It's easier to make plans knowing that you do such an awesome job and like riding around in the car and seeing new things!

You've definitely brought a lot of joy to both Daddy and I and also all the other family!  You are definitely everyone's favorite and everybody wants to see you and hold you as much as they can.  Mommy and Daddy feel pretty lucky to have such great family to help out with the transition and you are lucky to be SO loved!  Daddy is one special guy and we can't forget how much he does for both you and Mommy.  After working all day he comes home ready to hang out with his little guy and help around the house anyway he can.  He's awesome at giving Mommy a break when she needs it and doing exactly what Mommy needs, even if she doesn't know she needs it!  Mommy loves seeing you with Daddy and knowing just how much he loves you.  I can't imagine how hard it is for him to be at work all day and away from you!  We are definitely lucky to have such a great guy to take care of us.

Baby Swan...you definitely are a great  addition to the family!  Life before you seems like forever ago and I can't imagine not having you here.  The addition of you has brought Mommy and Daddy closer together and made Mommy appreciate and love Daddy more than ever.  The past two weeks have flown by and make me feel so lucky that I still have many weeks at home with you!  You've started fussing...time for Mommy to be done and go take care of you!

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Dad's blog to his son.

Hi little man.

It's your dad.  I figured I should check in since it's been since July that I contributed to this blog.  Your Mom made sure to remind me how long its been.

Well, you made it.  You have been welcomed into the world and your mom and I couldn't be happier.  You decided to make your arrival pretty interesting.  You made the announcement that you were on your way on Saturday at 8pm.  From that point on, Dad didn't sleep too much.  We waited 11 hours to head to the hospital and once we got there the marathon that was your birth started.  My job was pretty clear cut:  Make mom as comfortable as possible.  It wasn't as easy as I thought it would be and there were times where I was worried that Mom wasn't going to be able to go on, but you should know one thing.  Your mom is superwoman.  She might not act like it all the time, but just like a Trauscht, she stepped up when the pressure was on.  She hung through it all, the long labor, the pain, the lack of sleep.  There was even a point where Dad almost lost it.  I wasn't expecting to be very involved but I had no choice.  And after a little regrouping with myself I got back in it and helped mom welcome you to the world.  My favorite part was when they had you in the warming bed and the nurse told me I should say "Hi" and that you would recognize my voice.  I leaned over and said "Hello Ethan, welcome to our family."  And right on cue your little eyes popped open and to this day I swear you smiled.  I got to be the one to carry you over and introduce you to your mom.  You two were made for each other.  The look on her face is something i'll remember for the rest of my life.

Since coming home you've given us a run for our money.  You've been the focal point of our family and friends and everyone knows why.  You're so special and a wonderful baby so far.  We've been the typical nervous parents on more than a few occasions, but that was to be expected.  You've really settled into a groove and made it pretty easy for Mom and Dad.  Even Kona seems to like you being around, or maybe she just enjoys having someone around all day.  You have some really great Aunts and Uncle's and some outstanding Grandparents.  There are some extended family members that have yet to meet you but I just know they'll love you right away.  You're almost 14 days old now and time is already flying by in Dad's perspective.  Every day I leave for work is hard because I would much rather be at home with my new family.  But i guess someone has to make some money.  Weekends are that much more enjoyable because I can spend my time on the couch with my little buddy watching sports.  The nice part is Mom doesn't get too upset with me when I do this anymore because it gives her a break! :-)

There are so many things I look forward to teaching you and also experiencing with you.  Nothing is set in stone but I am hoping certain things are in the making.  One thing I do know is that you're going to have two loving parents for the rest of your life so get used to it.  I hope you enjoy this blog of yours because it's going to be an experience looking back on the things you experience and the stuff we remember.

Welcome to the world Ethan.  We're glad you're here.

Dad.

Friday, October 15, 2010

The Arrival of Baby Swan!

While the story is still fresh in my mind and baby swan is currently sleeping next to me, I thought I'd take the time to document the story of baby swan's arrival into the world.  This is mostly for me, so I remember the details of the labor and delivery of baby swan.  I'll try not to include too many graphic details, but consider yourself warned.

It all started Saturday, October 9th.  Kevin and I spent the day doing some yard work and trying to pass time while we still waited for baby swan.  We also had plans with my sister, Katie and her boyfriend that evening.  Kevin and I finally had plans after sitting around waiting for baby swan!  We went to my parents for cards and the Twins game with Katie and Chris.  We'd only been at the house for about 30 or 45 minutes.  Chris was talking to me about waiting and how I was handling it.  I made some off the shoulder comment about how people who's water breaks have it easy, they know that the baby is coming soon.  I'd been having some contractions on and off all day, but nothing really out of the ordinary.  In hind sight, I must have known something was different because I had this weird nagging feeling in the back of my head.  At one point I told Kevin to feel how rock hard my stomach was, and confided quietly that I'd been having contractions on and off all afternoon and evening.  It was then I decided I needed to use the restroom.  While walking across the kitchen at my parents house I felt a trickle, I started silently questioning myself if I had just peed my pants or if it was my water breaking.  It was confirmed shortly it was my water breaking, 8pm Saturday evening.  I discretely tried to tell Kevin we needed to head home, but realized I was never going to be able to leave without telling my family, so everyone there got to find out...baby swan would be arriving shortly (just not as short as we all originally thought!).

I called the midwife on-call on the way home and she told me to come in at 8:00am Sunday morning if I didn't get uncomfortable before then, but she thought she would see me in a few hours.  Kevin and I got home and started reading through the material for the hospital brushing up on what we needed to know.  I continued to have contractions, but not regularly and they weren't making me uncomfortable.  Around midnight I decided we need to head to bed and attempt to get some sleep.  Of course, who was I kidding...we were both too anxious and excited to really get quality sleep.  7am rolled around and I decided it was time to wake up and get ready to head into the hospital...only problem was, I didn't feel any contractions.  I felt like an idiot checking into the hospital without any contractions, and I started doubting that it was truly my water that broke the night before (even though I knew it was and Kevin kept reassuring me it was what I thought it was).  I got put into a triage room and the midwife came to check me.  My water did in fact break and I was 3cm dialted and 80% effaced.  Not much progress since my appointment, but a little.  They started IV fluids and told me that I'd be starting pitocin soon to get the labor moving.

Once into our delivery room and the Pitocin was started Kevin and I started making bets about when baby swan would make his arrival.  This was at 11am Sunday, October 10I can't remember what either of us guessed, but it was definitely that he would be born on 10-10-10.  We also called Bubba to wish her a Happy Birthday and let her know we'd be missing out on her birthday celebration, but that we'd likely have a gift for her later...little did we know.  So the Pitocin was running and Kevin and I were hanging out watching football all Sunday afternoon.  My contractions started getting stronger, but nothing I couldn't handle.  At 5:30pm my contractions were starting to make me pretty uncomfortable and I was waiting for the midwife to deliver another baby before I would be checked, so I decided to take a bath and try and relax.  The nurse turned off the lights and put a flashlight in the room, Kevin put the Ipod and speaker and I hung out by myself in the tub, singing along to the music whenever I had a contraction.  It was while I was in the tub, I decided I may need pain medication, but didn't want to make the decision until I knew how far along I had progressed.  The midwife came in and checked me and took the wind out of my sails...I was only 5 cm dialted and 100% effaced.  I had been laboring for 7.5 hours and hadn't progressed much at all.  I decided the epidural was needed and it couldn't come soon enough.

The epidural was a life saver.  I was able to sleep a little and just be more comfortable in general.  Kevin and I quickly realized that baby swan was likely not going to arrive 10-10-10.  When the midwife said goodbye to me at 7pm and told me she'd be back at 7am and she hoped I had a baby by then I thought she was kidding. I never thought it would take another 12 hours for me to have a baby, but she was just about right.  There were several times over the next few hours that I cried to Kevin that I wouldn't be able to do it.  I couldn't take anymore.  Kevin was awesome and kept telling me I had more strength than I knew and I could keep going.  It was what I needed to keep moving forward.At some point during the night they realized that baby swan had pooped in the womb and we would need more staff at his birthday party.  This made me nervous, but I was just focusing on having a healthy baby.  At 3:30am the midwife came to check me and told me that I was 10cm dialted and 100% effaced, but the baby was still a little high...she also told me I could start pushing.  The only problem was, I couldn't feel my contractions, just one painful spot on my pelvis.  We then decided that we'd wait a half hour and see if he'd dropped down any farther.  It was at 4am on Monday, October 11 that I truly started pushing.  I pushed for a half hour and felt like I made no progress, no one was telling me anything.  I started crying to Kevin telling him I couldn't do it, I didn't have anything left in me.  He kept telling me what he'd been telling me all night, that I could in fact do it and he would help in any way he could.  So at 4:30am I put my mind to it and started pushing like crazy.  I don't remember at what time, but suddenly the midwife said, you've done awesome we're going to have a baby.  This seemed surreal and the actual birth of baby swan seemed too easy.  So after 2 hours and 11 minutes of pushing...Ethan Daniel Trauscht was born at 6:11am weighing in at 8lbs 15oz and 22 inches long!  He also had a huge 15 inch head!  Due to the meconinium, I wasn't allowed to hold Ethan right away.  He was quickly wisked away after delivery to be checked and make sure everything was okay.  I wasn't able to hold him in my arms until he was almost 45 minutes old.  

So, the labor and delivery were about as far from what I thought would happen or could plan for, but in the end Kevin and I ended up with the most perfect little boy and we couldn't be happier.  The hospital stay was nothing like I envisioned either.  We ended up having to follow Ethan's blood sugar, feed him formula, deal with massive spitting up and trying to learn to how to breastfeed.  It was a whirlwind of things going on and we ended up home Tuesday night at 9pm.  Kevin and I were both exhausted and couldn't believe he was home.  Now just a few short days later...I'm feeling less sleep deprived, more confident in my ability as a mother and lucky as ever to have the most awesome husband in the world.  Truly this experience has brought Kevin and I so much closer together.  Kevin dealt with and did more than I ever thought he would and was my rock throughout the whole experience.  True to Kevin's form...he helped ease my anxiety, reassure my abilities and knowledge of what is right.  I'm so much more in love with him now than I was just a few short days ago.  Seeing Kevin as a dad is everything I thought he'd be.  It's obvious how much he adores Ethan and wants to be the best dad and husband in the world and he is.  I'm so lucky!!

If you've made it through this monster post, congratulations!  As soon as I find my camera charger and cord, I'll post pictures of Ethan.  I already have more pictures of this little man than I know what to do with, but I can't help document all of his cute little quirks!  So that's the update from the Swan family, we finally have a baby and are so head over heels in love with him!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Due Date

Today is Baby Swan's due date and alas, we have no baby.  I'd say Kevin was way off when he said he'd be born on September 28th.  I had little faith he'd be born early, but I thought maybe, just maybe he'd be here by now.  Oh well, that's life...he'll be here soon enough!  So today I had my 40 week appointment.  Not a whole lot happened, I'm about as far along as I was at my 39 week appointment.  I'm 1-2 cm dialated and about 50% effaced.  I know this has very little to do with when I'll deliver, but it would've been nice to see a little change this week.  I still am not really having any contractions, just a few every so often.  So we continue to sit and wait in the Swan household.  I'm still pretty comfortable and work is being flexible with allowing me to keep coming in and working up until I deliver Baby Swan.  Today at my appointment we talked about what is next.  If I'm still pregnant at 41 weeks I'll have an ultrasound and a non-stress test.  This is normal procedure and is just to make sure the placenta is still providing everything Baby Swan needs.  It is at this appointment that we'll also talk about induction and when we should evict  Baby Swan.  I really want to avoid an induction if at all possible, so I'm doing my best to sweet talk Baby Swan into coming this week.  The weather is beautiful and I think it'd be a lovely week to be born!  My sister is trying to convince him to come so he can watch Twins playoff baseball with him and get a chance to wear his new Twins onesie while the Twins are actually still playing!  We shall see what happens!

In other exciting news our good friends Jess and Aleks just had a baby boy, Kade Aleksandar, on October 3rd!  They didn't know what they were having so I was very excited to hear it was a boy, Baby Swan will have a playmate very close in age!  Aleks and I were roommates in college and it has been fun to share the experience of pregnancy and all the joys that come with it!  I still haven't had a chance to meet Kade, but I can't wait and am excited that Aleks and I will have maternity leave off together.  I also can't wait to talk to Aleks about her labor and birth story, it'll be nice to chat with someone who has gone through it so recently!

So this week brings more waiting, Kevin and I are trying to balance doing things and putting our lives on pause while we await Baby Swan's arrival.  We celebrated Gwen's golden birthday on Sunday and will celebrate Bubba's birthday this coming Sunday!  Hopefully before too long, we'll also be celebrating Baby Swan's birthday!  Until then, more waiting, continuing to work, get the house ready for a baby and just enjoy our last few days as a couple!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Week 38

Not a whole bunch to report, but a few things have been happening this week.  Had an appointment with my midwife on Wednesday, nothing new to report there.  Baby swan is head down, I'm dilated to 1cm and he appears to be pretty comfy in his current home.  I was hoping maybe the full moon would make some changes, but no such luck!

I worked last weekend, so I had Monday and Tuesday off this week.  It was nice to have a couple of days off during the week.  I got some errands run, and then caught up on sleep and relaxing.  Trying to fit more of this in before Baby Swan comes!  I also got a much needed massage on Monday morning, now if only I could get one of those every day-life would be heavenly!

Monday evening we met with the daycare lady to sign paperwork and confirm plans, her name is Debbie.  Debbie has kids our age and has been doing daycare for years.  We really like her fairly laid back attitude and the fact that she keeps the group around 4 or 5 kids.  I however felt like crying through the entire meeting with her.  Kevin confirmed that I did in fact look like I was about to burst into tears the entire time.  It's not that I'm worried about leaving Baby Swan with Debbie, I KNOW she will be great.  I went to daycare too, and I loved my daycare lady, I loved the friends I got to play with there and overall enjoyed the experience.  I however can't imagine someone else getting to spend more time a week with my son than I do.  It's not the way I thought it would go.  I thought I could get the best of both worlds, and maybe I will.  For now though...I had to sign paperwork saying he will be there M-F, 7am-5pm.  I know that most months he will get to spend a day a week with Bubba, I also know that it won't be everyday that he is there the entire time.  Logically I know all this.  Emotionally all I can think about is how someone else gets to spend more time with him being awake than I do.  That SUCKS.  I haven't even met the little guy yet and I can't help from tearing up when I think about having to drop him off at daycare, which by the way, Kevin already informed me I will not be dropping him off for fear of non-stop waterworks from me!  I have no idea if I will even have to go through the whole full-time daycare thing, maybe it'll work out and I'll get to go back to work part-time.  Either way Monday was one of the hardest days I've had in a long time, and also one of the many hard days I'm sure I'll have in Baby Swan's life.  For now, I'm focusing on how I get to be the lucky parent who gets at least 3 months off with him once he's here and that no matter what, I still get to be his mom! 

On to brighter news...yesterday I bought the last things of my "must have" list for Baby Swan.  I think we are officially ready for him to come.  I'm sure there are things that we will realize we need, but for now we're ready!  Well...we need to install the carseat bases in the cars, but other than that, we're done.  Our bags are packed and the waiting game continues! 

So this week brought some relaxtion, a little more preparation, daycare finalization, and more waiting.  We are getting very anxious to meet Baby Swan!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The Nursery!



As promised...a post about the nursery.  As finished as it's going to be before Baby Swan makes his arrival, and finished just one day shy of being full-term.  As most people know I like to search for things for the house, find ways to decorate and just change things up a bit.  Also...most people know that I have trouble making decisions and trusting my gut, which usually means my house doesn't end up decorated the way I envisioned it because I couldn't commit.  The nursery is a different story, I set out to make a gender neutral nursery despite which gender of child we were having, I also set out to finish it until I was happy with how it turned out.  I managed to accomplish both goals.  The nursery definitely has more of a boyish feel, but still is pretty gender neutral.  It all started off with the bedding, which I have grown to love more and more as I decorated around it.  I was going for a more modern feel which is definitely not usually my decorating taste, but I think the way the room ended up was the perfect blend of modern and traditional touches.  I won't bore everyone with details of how I came to decide everything for the nursery that I have, there has been lots of thought and debating but in the end I stuck with what I was originally thinking and love how it turned out.  There will definitely be more personal things added as we share Baby Swan's name, have pictures of our family and acquire more toys and baby gadgets, but for now with the addition of the art...it is finished.  I'll let the pictures do the rest of the talking. 

Looking into the room from the doorway
Another look into the room from the doorway, and of the fan as well!
The glider corner, night stand and modern animal prints
Green lamp, crib and bedding, and empty paper lanterns in place of the mobile
Bookcase and toy/storage baskets
Baby Swans closet!

So the nursery is finished, I'm now 37 weeks and considered full term and the hospital bag is packed.  Carseat bases will be added to the cars shortly and all we will have to do is sit and wait for Baby Swan to make his arrival.  I have another appointment with the midwife tomorrow and will update if there is any change in what's going on.  Otherwise it's just a waiting game in the Swan household!

Friday, September 10, 2010

36 weeks

It's been awhile since I've written...even longer for Kevin, but I suppose that's how it goes.  All is well in the Swan family.  The nursery is complete, minus art for the walls.  I ordered some modern animal art from an Etsy seller and am anxiously awaiting it's arrival.  Once the art is in the empty frames on the walls...the nursery will be complete, well minus a cute little baby swan!  When the art finally arrives I will take pictures  of the nursery and post them.  I'm loving how it turned out and really loving that this is the first room in the house I've re-decorated and finished completely!  This is no small task since I'm so indecisive I usually just look at options forever and never decide on anything.  It's the perfect balance of modern and traditional and gender neutral, but boy appropriate, just like I was hoping it would be.  It will be nice to know that baby swan's room is completely done until he comes up with his own preference for how his room is decorated.

Also, the painting in our house is complete as well.  My dad finished the living room and kitchen a few weeks ago and it looks great.  It was no small task to paint basically our entire upstairs, and I really appreciate his hard work and willingness to get the job done.  There is still a small area behind the fridge that didn't get painted and I'm okay with that.  You only see the unfinished part if you put your face up against the wall.  Surprisingly...it bugs my dad that it's not finished more than me.  I'm just happy to have the house put back together and to be all done with the painting before baby swan makes his appearance.  I'll work on the decorating part of these rooms later.

We are quickly approaching the full-term mark for baby swan and I am feeling more and more ready each day.  As far as pregnancy goes I'm still pretty comfortable and able to work no problem.  I feel so blessed to have had such an easy pregnancy.  Tying my shoes and bending over to pick things I've dropped up are getting more difficult, but if that's the worse I have to deal with, I'll take it!  We just have a few things to get that are necessities for baby swan and I and we will be all set for his arrival whenever he decides to come.  I can't believe I'm writing that...less than a month until the due date, CRAZY!!  I had a midwife appointment yesterday and everything is looking good.  Baby swan is head down, but still rather high up.  I'm only slightly dilated and it appears that baby swan is pretty comfy in his current home for now.  I'm okay with that, I have a few things I'd like to do before he comes and the longer he stays put the more likely I am to not have to go back to work until the New Year.  My midwife also confirmed my thoughts about having a bigger baby, she told me he doesn't feel like a small baby, but she's only saying that based on how he feels from the outside.  I tried to convince her maybe he's just really tall, but she didn't seem to buy it...I guess we'll find out soon enough.

Life around here is pretty much the same as always.  We are checking things off the ever shortening to-do list, making last trips to cabins before baby swan makes his arrival and continuing to work hard at work.  This weekend should be filled with some relaxing, a little shopping, some cooking of meals for the freezer and completed by another baby shower thrown by Bubba.  I'm looking forward to the shower and spending the weekend with Kevin enjoying one of our few remaining weekends until we are joined by baby swan.  Until then more of the same, with hopefully a little more relaxing and spending time with those we love before we become a family of 4 (we can't forget Kona!)